Oh man, it hurts to talk about it but a time where I
failed this semester was with my Managerial Accounting class. You are warned before
taking the class about how difficult the course load will be and how people end
up retaking it for the 2nd or 3rd time. However I was off
to a good start. I did well in the quizzes every week and even did okay on the
first exam. I knew I was going to pass the class. This was until it came time
for the 2nd exam. I had reviewed for a week and felt pretty darn
prepared for the exam on Wednesday. I came home from work that Wednesday with
ample time to review before the 8:00 exam. I had just emailed the tutor from
Study Edge for a couple extra tokens to watch a review video for the exam when
I got a response that I thought was a joke. He emailed me back with the tokens
but asked whether the email itself had sent late because the exam had already
finished. I laughed it off but went to check anyway…he was right. I had missed
the exam. The way the class was set up, there was no way I could come back from
that and still pass the class. I could have blamed it on Irma or the professor
for not sending out enough of an announcement that would have been hard to
miss, but in the end while it was a tough pill to swallow I had to accept that
it was my own fault for not checking thoroughly enough. I have learned not take
anything for granted and not to be overconfident just because I am managing to
do well until that point. Sometimes I overlook details because I’m so sure of
myself and this eventually leads to a loss that forces me to humble myself.
However, I’ve missed out on enough and made this mistake enough times to decide
that something needs to change.
Failure is extremely hard to stomach for me in the
moment. Its easy for me to lose track of time just wallowing in regret and
self-pity when something doesn’t go as planned. This usually ends in me trying
to cover it up or sweep it under the rug so that people close to me don’t find
out; I’m more afraid of them judging me to be incompetent than anything so I
try to keep them from finding out. This class has definitely taught me
about embracing failure and using it to
make future attempts more successful. While its still hard for me to accept a
failure, its easier to look at the big picture and look beyond the temporary
pit to see what I can do next.
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